Who Needs Camping?

Camping has always been important to Colin and I. Before being parents, we'd decide on a Friday evening that we want to go away for the weekend, so we'd stick some instant oatmeal, bread, peanut butter and jam in the truck and off we'd go.

I hope camping isn't a pasttime. Sometimes it seems like it is. It's just so much easier to stay in a motel with a kid. The running warm water makes everything so much easier. Baths, meals, cleanup after meals...I just don't know if I could vacation without it anymore. And carpet is nicer than dirt. Electricity better than dangerous campfires and lanterns.

I think Nathan's only spent 1.5 nights in a tent so far, but now that he's getting bigger, we really want to get out there more.

A long weekend just passed which would have been a great opportunity to do so. But for whatever reason (um....laziness??), we didn't plan anything. Since I feel bad for missing a great sunshiny weekend away, I thought I'd reflect on the worst camping trips we've had so I don't feel as bad about missing it.

If you were with us on any of these trips, IT'S NOT YOU that made the trip bad. Just the situation ;-)

As I'm thinking about them, I realize that most of them have to do with the quality of sleep I got! Funny. Here we go. Our top 4 worst camping trips/sleeps in reverse order:

5. On one of our last-minute-on-a-Friday-night vacations, we had no place to stay and nowhere to pitch a tent, so we pulled over and parked at some cabin and slept in the box of the truck. We spent the first hour swatting mosiquitos (I think we lost count at 30). Then Colin, being so tall, stretched out diagonally in the box leaving me a tiny corner in which to sleep in the fetal position.

4. Went camping with another couple, their 2 year old and dog. She was pregnant at the time (the mom not the dog...). We went in 2 cars. Along we're going on the hope-princeton and our truck was hit by a deer! Yes you read that right, the deer hit US. It rammed right into the side of the driver door, destroying the mirror and denting the door so bad it couldn't be opened. And the stupid deer just go up and ran off! I was so mad. In some States you're allowed to keep roadkill. If I could keep the deer meat, at least I'd get something out of the $300 ICBC deductible!!! Was SO glad it didn't hit the other couple's car though.

So we went driving on a logging road up a mountain (NOT my favourite thing to do). At the top, we got out and watched helicopters flying overhead with buckets of water to fight a forest fire on a nearby hill. That part was cool. But then we cooked hot dogs and who comes along, but a bear! We have a dog provoking the bear, a pregnant woman, and a 2 year old, and we're cooking lunch with a bear nearby!?! Apparently I was the only person concerned by this. Nothing happened though but I have a few grey hairs from that day.

We pitched our tents near a wasp nest and were swatting wasps all evening. Our tents were on dry deep slanted sandy hill and every time we moved in or around the tent, it would shift. Pretty annoying.

3. We were sleeping in an RV and there was a lot of snoring going on. A LOT. So after a few hours of trying to sleep, we gave up. I went and slept in the hatch of my Honda Civic and Colin crashed underneath the RV.

2. Nathan's first tenting experience was last June. A normally warm month, unless you're at Tunkwa Lake up....actually I don't know where it is. But is was C-O-L-D. Below freezing for sure overnight. We showed up at 10pm and put up out tent. We put Nathan in his warm jammies, some other clothes, a tuke, and cuddled him in his playpen with all the blankets. I checked on him shortly after going to bed and his cheeks were FREEZING, so I got him out of the playpen and snuggled with him in my sleeping bag. Babies take up more room than adults though, and he soon kicked me out of the sleeping bag, leaving me shivering all night with no blankets. Not a wink of sleep that night.

And the worst?

1. For our 1st anniversary we went white water rafting on the Thompson and stayed overnight in the Jade Springs (?) campsite. It was recommended by the rafting company, as buses met there in the morning to take us on our adventure.

Little did we know our adventure had begun LONG before we hit the water.

So we set up camp and are enjoying sitting around the table playing cards when the noise started. People came by asking us, "aren't you coming to the party?". Party? Uh no, we're not. I heard quite a few derrogatory comments about us. We are so lame, you know. The evening got louder and louder and sober people were quickly becoming outnumbered at a ratio of 2:200.

By the time bed time hit, I went to go use the washroom. The toilets were full to the brim and overflowing ALL over the floor with regular toilet stuff, toilet paper and vomit. I guess I had to use the bush but don't remember that part.

We lay in our tent trying desperately to sleep amidst the loud music and drunk people. I guess we eventually did fall asleep, but were awoken in the dead of night by some voices very near to our tent saying, "I wonder if they mind if we're laying on their car" or something to that extent. Colin, a normally well-tempered guy TOTALLY lost it and lets just say got these goofballs to get off the car.

I don't think we slept another wink after that.

There they are! Maybe if we went away this weekend the experience would have landed a spot on this list. Guess it was good we stayed home.

Elevator Etiquiette 101

Ok so I've been thinking of writing this post now for about 6 months, but thought I'd give people a bit of time to prove to me that they know proper elevator etiquette. But I realize it has to be written to benefit all elevator users.

RULES FOR ELEVATOR ETIQUIETTE

1. Do not shove your body (or any part thereof) between the closing elevator doors for the following reasons:

• If you are not familiar with the particular elevator, you don't know how merciless it is, and it may not stop regardless of the presence of your limb.
• Look around. There are other elevators. If you wait for another, you may even get to your floor faster.

2. Do not shove the body (or any part thereof) of another person between the closing elevator doors. *ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE PUSHING THIS PERSON IN A WHEELCHAIR WITH THEIR LEG IN A CAST STICKING STRAIGHT OUT IN FRONT OF THEM. They are already injured enough. Although perhaps this is how the injury happened.

3. If you are waiting for the elevator, do not stand IMMEDIATELY in front of the doors. People may be inside the elevator wanting to get out on the floor you are waiting on, and they cannot get out if you are blocking the way. Allow people to exit before you enter. *This is especially important if you are waiting on the MAIN FLOOR for an elevator. Everyone gets out here. Please give them room.

4. Try to stifle your coughing. Use proper coughing etiquette (cough and/or sneeze into the crook of your elbow) instead of letting those puppies go airborne. Other nor particularly pleasant bodily functions are best done before or after your ride.

5. Choose ONE floor where you would like to go. Do not press the button until you are sure you're getting off there.

6. Do not press the "door open" button if you see people coming in the distance. They can get the next one. Yes, you're being courteous to them by holding the door, but you are being un-courteous to the rest of the people in the elevator who have places to go. Besides, by the time that person gets inside, there will be another one in the distance you'll have to wait for. This cycle repeats until the elevator is full.

7. Don't joke about there being "too much weight" in the elevator to a pregnant lady (the class "Manners 101" is coming soon).

8. If there is a lineup for the elevators, for heavens sake do not waltz to the front of the line. Wait like everyone else.

9. If you're not sick, and not injured, do not take the elevator ONE floor (provided the stairwells are open to the public, which they are not in my building so you get a pass on this rule in the building where I work).

10. Get off the phone before you get it. Have you not seen the commercials? Most cell phones do not work in the elevator so do not be surprised if you hear a chorus of "no duhh" when you exclaim with disgust that your cell phone dropped the call.

Stay tuned for Class 201.

Thanks, Canucks

We were contacted by Point-To-Point Destinations last week to attend a 2nd timeshare presentation with them. Personally, I am through with those...at least for awhile.

The last place we went to gave us a free two night stay in Yaletown (midweek). We actually would be going next week. Since it was mid-week, I'd be commuting about 10 minutes to get to work which I was super excited for. They asked for a $30 booking fee. Apprehensively, we paid it. $15 a night is awesome still. Then when our confirmation came, they said that the $30 fee was for a motel north of Vancouver, and to stay in Yaletown we need to pay another $100. AS IF!! We didn't pay and demanded our $30 back. And we got it. Phew.

But we'd been to this place before, and knew their gifts were legit. They offered us two round 3 playoff tickets for $99 if we came and listened to the same 90 minute presentation as before.

So Colin dragged me down. I wasn't even going to the game, so whoever Colin takes owes me BIG TIME.

We get there and meet our salesman. The guy who's trained to suck the money right out of us. He's actually not slimy like most. A nice guy with a brand new daughter, so at least we had something to talk about (I did change the subject when the words "breast feeding" came up).

He was surprised that we were asked to come down a second time (first time was when we were pregnant with Nathan - read about it here). He said there was something written on our file that indicated we were interested the first time, but couldn't make a decision then.

I wonder what was written? What part of "We're only here for the Canucks tickets" did they not understand?

Since I am "done" with these, I was showing no interest at all and within the first 20 minutes or so he actually said that he doesn't see us really needing one, but we have to stay for the whole presentation. Oh fine.

We watched the movie they play and we laughed through it and made whispering comments to each other. We went by the coffee cookie table about 3 times to re-stock (when you're pregnant you can get away with anything).

Then it came to the part I H-A-T-E. The financials. I already know we can't afford it. I mean DUHH, I'm going on mat leave and Colin doesn't have this necessary thing called a "job". But the way they present it, it really does look affordable. Plus, this is our 5th presentation now, and it is by far the best deal out there (just in case you want to get a timeshare, er, "vacation ownership").

I started to feel sick. Were we actually going to buy it? I had to go to the bathroom.

Usually they don't let you leave the table (a sales tactic) but pregnancy is a great excuse. While I was away from the pressure I realized that it was a BAD idea. I pictured my dad's face if I were to tell him I bought a timeshare.

I went back to the table with a clear head, and a shaking head. They made it cheaper and cheaper for us and even brought out the "closer", a Jamacian guy with the most infectious smile you have EVER seen.

But we stayed strong.

As we were signing for the Canucks tickets, the small print said that if the Canucks don't make it to the 3rd round of the playoffs, then we get the $99 refunded, and..... a $100 VISA gift card!! YEE HAW!

From that moment on, I was cheering for Chicago. Well, I was trying to. It's actually harder than you think.

Canucks lost the game on Saturday. One step closer to my $100. When the Canucks lost that game last night I stood up and cheered because now I can go shopping!